when life isn’t all that pretty

Have you ever had the stomach flu?  Miserable, right?  Now let’s top that.  Have you ever had the stomach flu while pregnant?  Awful, miserable, terrible.  Let’s go even further…have you ever had the stomach flu while you have a breastfed baby at home?  It’s the worst.  I just had the pleasure of experiencing this last one.

I find that I often, as I think most people do, share about the happier, more positive moments in their life.  Like when I am going to post a photo on Instagram, I share a peaceful moment reading with my kids, or I share a picture of the awesome dessert I just made.  I DO NOT, on the other hand, post pictures of the giant mess my house becomes throughout the work week, or of me after a day of the stomach flu.

Well, I’ll do my best now to take you inside my life when it isn’t all that pretty.

I woke up on Saturday morning at about 1:15 am and I knew I was sick.  Andrew had thrown up four times on Thursday {once in the middle of the night and once after each meal}.  Despite the fact that I washed and cleaned EVERYTHING more than once and made sure to wash my hands so often they were dry and cracking by the end of the day, I knew I would probably end up with the flu too {Andrew had coughed right in my face after nursing on Thursday night…how was I supposed to “clean up” after that?!}.  After about four hours of nausea and running to the bathroom hoping I would just get the throwing-up over with, I heard Andrew crying in his nursery, up for his morning nursing session.  I practically fell down the stairs and prayed the entire time, please just let me feed him and get him back to bed before I throw up.  As I was walking him back to his crib, I knew I was done for.  Let’s just say that I have very kind guardian angels who did not want my poor son to end up a filthy mess.  I BARELY made it to the bathroom…and so it began.  I could barely move all day.  I would get up to nurse Andrew, then stumble back to bed.  I ate the kids’ Pedialyte Popsicles all day, but they weren’t even enough to quench my thirst.  It was awful.  I worried that I wouldn’t make enough milk for Andrew.  I was achy.  Uncomfortable.  Thirsty.  Having to take care of a baby while having the stomach flu is so much worse than being pregnant with the stomach flu.  My husband even did most of the work all day, and it was still awful {did I mention that he and our oldest daughter were also sick the same day?}.  Poor Caitlyn was stuck in front of the TV all day.  Poor Andrew was fussy and didn’t understand why I wasn’t holding him and playing with him.  Samantha was quarantined downstairs.  I practically locked myself in my bedroom upstairs.  What a day.

Now here I am, finally feeling better, but not great.  The house is a mess.  I am slowly, slowly working through all the laundry that was dirtied during the awful stomach flu.  The kitchen will have to wait.  The bathrooms will have to wait.  My hair will have to wait.  The piles and piles of clean laundry will have to wait.

As many beautiful and happy pictures I share and as many posts I write about wonderful moments in my life, I assure you, there are just as many, if not more of those “not so pretty” moments I am choosing to keep to myself.  While I love my life with my three kids, it’s nowhere near perfect, and it’s definitely not always pretty.


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